I am amazed at how people can give you help when you never asked for it. Recently, I met a few in school and today, I'm feeling a lot more at ease thanks to these people.
It was only a week ago when I met the first. I was admiring an arts exhibition upstairs from my classroom when this old man came up to me and struck a conversation with me, all the while dropping advice and his opinions of life even though I never asked. As though God sent, the words anchored deep into my head. Those were answers I had been seeking for a long while, and just when I thought all hopes are lost, some stranger comes by and hands you valuable pieces of advice.
The second person whom has helped me without request was one of my classmates from Malaysia. We were merely talking about work when he decided to share the lessons he had learnt from his attachment at Sentosa. I was deeply impressed and envious. Even today, he is sharing his lessons and opinions with me. At the same time, I've gotten to know of this new girl in class whom I now regard as a sister and friend. She adviced me about my setbacks and offered me solutions, regarding my work attachment and my depression due to bad working environment.
"Dun becos of people then degrade yourself, and most importantly .. start in tiny steps first then go for the big steps later" She said.
These people have contributed to me, and I am deeply grateful to them especially at this point of my life; when I'm currently going through the toughest period in 22 years of my life. I hope that someday I may give back to them what I earn along the way, and share my treasures with them.
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
All I Want Is Some Peace and Quiet
Sometimes, I just wish I could roar, shout, scream and kick. I get home and all I get is parents nagging at me all day long. I've had enough of their endless complains and naggings. As much as I appreciate their concerns for me, I just want some peace and quiet without them going on and on as though it'd help me one bit.
Why is it nobody ever listens to me when I talk? My classmates don't listen, people don't listen, even parents don't listen. Am I non-existent? Are my opinions and feelings worth nothing? Why is it that the whole world seems to deserve their right to shoot their f**king mouths off while I always have to keep quiet? Do I not derserve to rant, rave and have my own space? Am I not human? Am I worth nothing?
I've had enough bullsh*t from work and school, now I come home I still have to endure the noise. Does anyone ever understand my sorrows, my stress and anything I do at all? Does anyone ever care about the loneliness, isolation and misery I go through? I'm only glad I never reached the edge where I begin to contemplate suicide. I seem to have a determination not to die by my own hands, rather wanting to go away with honor and glory. I'd rather die a hero or not die at all.
Why is it nobody ever listens to me when I talk? My classmates don't listen, people don't listen, even parents don't listen. Am I non-existent? Are my opinions and feelings worth nothing? Why is it that the whole world seems to deserve their right to shoot their f**king mouths off while I always have to keep quiet? Do I not derserve to rant, rave and have my own space? Am I not human? Am I worth nothing?
I've had enough bullsh*t from work and school, now I come home I still have to endure the noise. Does anyone ever understand my sorrows, my stress and anything I do at all? Does anyone ever care about the loneliness, isolation and misery I go through? I'm only glad I never reached the edge where I begin to contemplate suicide. I seem to have a determination not to die by my own hands, rather wanting to go away with honor and glory. I'd rather die a hero or not die at all.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
"Wah This One Have To Aim Properly!"
As I was walking out from one of the washrooms at Bugis Junction today, I couldn't believe my ears when this uncle walked in and commented upon seeing the urinal, "wah this one have to aim properly arh!" then he simply leaned against the wall infront of the urinal and did his business.
That was definitely the most hilarious comment I've heard this week. What? Like, you mean you've been spraying all around your whole life? *TSK TSK~!!*
That was definitely the most hilarious comment I've heard this week. What? Like, you mean you've been spraying all around your whole life? *TSK TSK~!!*
Short Term Goals
To Achieve Within 6 Months
- Lower phonebill to $80 per month
- clear debts (phonebills, fines, etc)
- save up $100 per month
- live independantly (and problem free) without social life
- limit expenditure to $300 per month
- retain connection with Mark, Lawrence, Jacq and former Chillicrap members
- re-establish connection with former BPGHS schoolmates - BP06 Gang; Stanley, Edward and CO.
- build up fitness and get back in shape
- understand TCC's operations and menu
To Achieve By 2008
- Obtain Diploma in Culinary Craft & Service Excellence with credits and WSQ/WDA Certificate
- understand requirements for overseas work placement
- sufficient funds for overseas trip / employment
- save up funds to obtain a Driver's License
- introduce BPGHS to At-Sunrice diploma courses
Friday, September 21, 2007
"Does the art of woodcarving evoke some episodes of pain in your own life? If you were the trunk, do you then interpret your life through the filter of suffering and pain, seeing yourself a victim of your own circumstance, or do you instead anticipate your eventual triumph and elevation of your spirit after the work is done and you stand before all as a piece of art? You decide." - Christopher Lim
Thursday, September 20, 2007
"Okay I Think I've Said Enough. . ."
While I was on my way home from the bus interchange, this young lady approached me and introduced herself. A quick glance told me she's trying to sell me another "great" insurance plan, and reluctantly I let her talk me into sitting down.
5 minutes into our conversation, she brings up a folder just as I expected then begins to introduce me to this MediShield plan they have. She did not even bother to look into my folio to see if I had any other needs. A little while later, I remain unconvinced. Enter Unnamed Guy, half way into our conversation. He smiled at me, and without first shaking my hands the fella sat down with an air of cockiness before introducing himself(to which I forgot his name). The next thing I know, the idiot decided to pull off a joke, "Don't you think I'm handsome?" said Unnamed Guy chuckling to himself while I reluctantly faked a laughter. I was amused at how unprofessional this guy was, cuts into conversations, invites himself in unceremoniously. . . I swear I almost wanted to leave.
Wanting to hear whatever goods they might offer, I continued amusing them. As usual, Unnamed Guy decided to push further into the MediShield Plan, absolutely convinced I need it badly without first checking my needs and claiming to help me like the "noble" people they are. I was not impressed. 20 minutes later, I was still unconvinced and with arms crossed, I said very firmly, "I still need to think this through very thoroughly".
With a very pissed look on his face, he mumbled something to the girl and looked at me with his face slightly turned to the side. "Okay, I think I've said enough. Thank you very much for your time."
With that I thanked him as politely as I could and left. I was definitely pissed and this wasn't the first time someone from Prudential got on my black list. The joker was only fortunate I did not obtain his name card or I would have made sure very personally that Prudential gets my "blessings" the next morning. "Prudential again!" I thought to myself and decided the next time an agent from Prudential shows up, I'd scrutinised the agent from head to toe before I think about signing on the dotted line.
Insurance agents these days just think they're very smart. Young lads and young ladies have no qualms about selling their Plans without even first considering the needs of the customer/client and gaining their trust. Just like untrained service staffs, they lack positive attitude and behave unprofessionally. I can only wonder how they managed to get into the industry, and I pity the companies for having such poor untrained employees. The keyword I think everyone should work with today is Service Excellence. Without it, you're worthless.
PS: HuiYee thinks I'm being over demanding and has expressed displeasure doing any possible business with me in future.
5 minutes into our conversation, she brings up a folder just as I expected then begins to introduce me to this MediShield plan they have. She did not even bother to look into my folio to see if I had any other needs. A little while later, I remain unconvinced. Enter Unnamed Guy, half way into our conversation. He smiled at me, and without first shaking my hands the fella sat down with an air of cockiness before introducing himself(to which I forgot his name). The next thing I know, the idiot decided to pull off a joke, "Don't you think I'm handsome?" said Unnamed Guy chuckling to himself while I reluctantly faked a laughter. I was amused at how unprofessional this guy was, cuts into conversations, invites himself in unceremoniously. . . I swear I almost wanted to leave.
Wanting to hear whatever goods they might offer, I continued amusing them. As usual, Unnamed Guy decided to push further into the MediShield Plan, absolutely convinced I need it badly without first checking my needs and claiming to help me like the "noble" people they are. I was not impressed. 20 minutes later, I was still unconvinced and with arms crossed, I said very firmly, "I still need to think this through very thoroughly".
With a very pissed look on his face, he mumbled something to the girl and looked at me with his face slightly turned to the side. "Okay, I think I've said enough. Thank you very much for your time."
With that I thanked him as politely as I could and left. I was definitely pissed and this wasn't the first time someone from Prudential got on my black list. The joker was only fortunate I did not obtain his name card or I would have made sure very personally that Prudential gets my "blessings" the next morning. "Prudential again!" I thought to myself and decided the next time an agent from Prudential shows up, I'd scrutinised the agent from head to toe before I think about signing on the dotted line.
Insurance agents these days just think they're very smart. Young lads and young ladies have no qualms about selling their Plans without even first considering the needs of the customer/client and gaining their trust. Just like untrained service staffs, they lack positive attitude and behave unprofessionally. I can only wonder how they managed to get into the industry, and I pity the companies for having such poor untrained employees. The keyword I think everyone should work with today is Service Excellence. Without it, you're worthless.
PS: HuiYee thinks I'm being over demanding and has expressed displeasure doing any possible business with me in future.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
My Top Few Priorities From Now On . . .
1. Health and fitness
2. Career
3. Money
4. Family
5. Friends
6. Female relationships
2. Career
3. Money
4. Family
5. Friends
6. Female relationships
5 Years Later, I Wish To. . .
1. Be able to have a stable job with leading position in a kitchen
2. have sufficient income to fully support myself, with enough to rent or invest in property
3. have a drivers' license
4. have worked in at least 2 or 3 different countries, from Europe to Asia
5. be able to save up for parents to retire in peace
6. have sufficient income to rent or invest in a car
7. officially date a girl
8. be able to finally have a proper relationship
9. see Mark happily married, with or without children
10. be able to witness Andy and Julia's wedding
11. get Lawrence a good wife (if he hasn't any by then)
2. have sufficient income to fully support myself, with enough to rent or invest in property
3. have a drivers' license
4. have worked in at least 2 or 3 different countries, from Europe to Asia
5. be able to save up for parents to retire in peace
6. have sufficient income to rent or invest in a car
7. officially date a girl
8. be able to finally have a proper relationship
9. see Mark happily married, with or without children
10. be able to witness Andy and Julia's wedding
11. get Lawrence a good wife (if he hasn't any by then)
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
"Come to your senses. It is not the things of this world, be they chocolate or brown rice, that lead you astray. Losing your way comes from giving no mind to what is present while chasing after imaginary pleasures which are illusive and unobtainable. To wake up is to know what is already yours. " - Edward Espe Brown
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Confused
As we were admiring the scenery somewhere in Punggol, I waited until we were alone before I finally decided to spill the beans. I told her how much she resembled my ex and she wasn't appalled, instead she was more interested to know what was similar between her and Michelle.
We had a little chat later on, and in between conversations we learnt a bit about each other. Judging from our personalities and perspective, I conclude once again that it just wouldn't be possible for us to be together.
I miss her now, but I don't know if I miss her more than I miss Michelle. In fact, I don't even know why I miss her. I wonder if I miss her simply because she looks and behave like Michelle or because I actually enjoyed being around her... I must be out of my mind, deluded and insane. We've been out together for no more than one week anyway, and never alone together.
We had a little chat later on, and in between conversations we learnt a bit about each other. Judging from our personalities and perspective, I conclude once again that it just wouldn't be possible for us to be together.
I miss her now, but I don't know if I miss her more than I miss Michelle. In fact, I don't even know why I miss her. I wonder if I miss her simply because she looks and behave like Michelle or because I actually enjoyed being around her... I must be out of my mind, deluded and insane. We've been out together for no more than one week anyway, and never alone together.
Sunday, September 09, 2007
I met up with some net friends today, and I realised that there's this girl who resembles Michelle. She has her eyes.. her smile, but she's just taller and a little bigger size than my ex. Her eyes are just slightly larger than Michelle, but those sparkly eyes are the same.. as though they're twins.... her lips.. her smile, just slightly bigger than that of Michelle's. She absolutely reminds me of her. For the second time in my life, there's another girl who looks like my ex-girlfriend.
I must not get involved with her. I must avoid her or I'd lose control of myself and let my heart get to my brains. I miss Michelle, I miss her like crazy.
I must not get involved with her. I must avoid her or I'd lose control of myself and let my heart get to my brains. I miss Michelle, I miss her like crazy.
Saturday, September 08, 2007
Friday, September 07, 2007
"How Come You Can Speak Mandarin?"
Deciding to pay a visit to my former colleagues and kitchen manager Sam and Hairul, I went down to California Pizza Kitchen today after I finished school.
As I sat down to have dinner with Indra and Aidil, this China girl came over and looked at me, curious. Knowing what's on her mind without asking, I smiled and explained in fluent mandarin, "I used to work here."
Somehow surprised, she asked, "Are you a Singaporean or (China)Chinese?"
"I'm a Singaporean." I replied.
"How come you can speak mandarin?" the poor girl asked, baffled.
"That's because I'm a Chinese, you can't tell?" I said.
"So all Singaporean Chinese can speak mandarin?" she asked.
The conversation amused me, because this was not the first time a China national asked me these questions. Alamak, you think all Singaporean Chinese *jiak gung dang one meh? We may be an English speaking nation, but for your information we Chinese actually still speak mandarin(although not fluently).
*jiak gung dang - eating potatoes; in hokkien, often used to describe English speaking Chinese
As I sat down to have dinner with Indra and Aidil, this China girl came over and looked at me, curious. Knowing what's on her mind without asking, I smiled and explained in fluent mandarin, "I used to work here."
Somehow surprised, she asked, "Are you a Singaporean or (China)Chinese?"
"I'm a Singaporean." I replied.
"How come you can speak mandarin?" the poor girl asked, baffled.
"That's because I'm a Chinese, you can't tell?" I said.
"So all Singaporean Chinese can speak mandarin?" she asked.
The conversation amused me, because this was not the first time a China national asked me these questions. Alamak, you think all Singaporean Chinese *jiak gung dang one meh? We may be an English speaking nation, but for your information we Chinese actually still speak mandarin(although not fluently).
*jiak gung dang - eating potatoes; in hokkien, often used to describe English speaking Chinese
Sunday, September 02, 2007
性格水果
你的性格水果: 香蕉
香蕉男孩
◆个性
做事不干脆的男生，且有时会被认为是个不懂自尊是何物的人。平常面对人总是笑嘻嘻的，而这笑容常让人感到不自在。个性虽然有点任性但内心却是很纯真的。
◆恋爱·结婚倾向
容易同时跟很多异性一起交往，是个博爱型的人，但是他对于每一份感情又都是很认真的，属于敢爱敢恨型，对他而言，外遇不是为了好玩，而是他生存的支柱。
◆工作
虽然做事很认真但在公司的薪水并不高，比较属于独立创业才能成功的类型。如果处事太过于清高，不与人同流合污的话，或许会因此受到同事的排挤。
◆金钱运
是属于花钱搞异性关系的人，去小酒馆是理所当然的事，而当有女生拜托时，即使自己是过着粗茶淡饭的穷苦日子，也会打肿脸充胖子地给予协助。
外遇指数★★★★★ 恋母情节指数★ 嫉妒指数★★★★
香蕉男孩
◆个性
做事不干脆的男生，且有时会被认为是个不懂自尊是何物的人。平常面对人总是笑嘻嘻的，而这笑容常让人感到不自在。个性虽然有点任性但内心却是很纯真的。
◆恋爱·结婚倾向
容易同时跟很多异性一起交往，是个博爱型的人，但是他对于每一份感情又都是很认真的，属于敢爱敢恨型，对他而言，外遇不是为了好玩，而是他生存的支柱。
◆工作
虽然做事很认真但在公司的薪水并不高，比较属于独立创业才能成功的类型。如果处事太过于清高，不与人同流合污的话，或许会因此受到同事的排挤。
◆金钱运
是属于花钱搞异性关系的人，去小酒馆是理所当然的事，而当有女生拜托时，即使自己是过着粗茶淡饭的穷苦日子，也会打肿脸充胖子地给予协助。
外遇指数★★★★★ 恋母情节指数★ 嫉妒指数★★★★
Saturday, September 01, 2007
Parting Shots
Mark's birthday(8th Aug) - Lawrence, Donovan, Mark and yours truly
Baked morrocan spiced duck pie with grape and mint salad, Tuna tataki with shimeiji mushrooms, Foie grais parfait with toasted brioche (Entree` platter @ Poppi, The Legends at Fort Canning)
'Grande Assiete' Champagne sorbet, Brut Rose jelly and roses, basil pannacotta, Valrhona chocolate and expresso parfait, classic lemon tart, brandy snap with fig cream and raspberries (Desserts from Poppi @ The Legends at Fort Canning) New Recipe~! Courtesy of Mom
I was having dinner today when I made a little discovery. Mom made two dishes today; Boar Meat in Dark Soy Sauce with Julienne Ginger garnished with Spring Onions, and canned Sardines. After mom and dad had their fill, I threw the two dishes into the rice, mixed everything up and out came something new. Guess what? It was tasty!
With this, I've just been inspired to make new inventions with traditional home made recipes. In fact, this reminds me of the animated movie Ratatouille in which the story also carried the concept of introducing an old traditional dish into a restaurant menu, therefore saving them in the nick of time.
With this, I've just been inspired to make new inventions with traditional home made recipes. In fact, this reminds me of the animated movie Ratatouille in which the story also carried the concept of introducing an old traditional dish into a restaurant menu, therefore saving them in the nick of time.