Life is so fragile. Today i might be standing here talking to you but i might be gone tomorrow and once gone is gone. We only have one life to live.
One life.. just one.. the question which everyone should be asking themselves is how are you going to live that one life? How to deal with it?
We always need something to believe in like there is a God above, there is a loved one waiting for us, we still have many things yet to accomplish.
A life with no reason is as good as dead. You find life meaningless. How can anyone dunno the reason why he is living? What's your purpose of life? If you still dunno, set yourself a goal. A goal can be anything.. you want to be a millionaire, you want to marry young, you want to travel around the world, you want to watch a WC match live in stadium, you want to attempt sky diving and the list just goes on.
Sometime we feel depressed, lost, confused when we somehow lost the reason to live. There is nothing to look forward to.. Days are long, you hate what you are doing, you just want to sit one corner and rot doing nothing. U wish thing is not like this now. Soon anger consume you. You start to blame thing that had happened, you start to blame yourself, you start to blame people.
Yes, I went through all this and more and i believe there are more to come. Gone are the days when im foolish and angry. Gone are the days when i feel the world own me an explanation why bad things happened to me. Gone are the days when i dunno how to let go.
Since young, i always wanted to be the bad guy. I love violence, brute force, i always wish i have some dark power. Funny thing is, the more i wish for it, the more i can't get it. That was when i slowly begin to understand that to wish for something is actually a curse. Dun wish.. go work for it. Wishing upon something is you just kneel one corner and wish or you go find a lamp and rub on it hoping genie will appear. Wish is just something you want that will just appear out of nowhere.
If you dun do something about it, your wish will never come true. Is like i wish i am the bad guy.. i wish only, but when i try to do bad things, i can't. It was then i realise no matter how hard i try wishing, things wont appear out of thin air nor will genie morph in front of me. If you try to do something to make the wish happen, if it not meant to be it will never happened.. thats why im not singapore most notorious criminal (although i really wish i am back then MUA HA HA HA HA)
As i aged, i grew weak. I slowly slowly hate violence, i no longer wish i have superpower to do bad things not do i wish i have superpower to do good things. I dun want to be my all time fav villain The Joker nor do i want to be Batman. I just want a peaceful life. I dun want to be millionaire, i dun want be poor too... i just want a very normal life.. find someone to love and get loved in returned.... if i can, i would like to retreat to a small little farm somewhere away from the city and really live happily with the woman that loves me...
Dun need to work endlessly just to climb a cooperate ladder. Dun need to get married and realised few years later becoz of our modern lifestyle which depend on $, our marriage fail... so what if i managed to work my way to become a CEO or even the world richest man in the world richest company? So what if i can walked down the aisle and make that wedding vow and signed on the dotted line in the wedding cert that make us married legally?
Hahaha.. you know, talking is cheap. we all know we cant have things to happen exactly the way you want it to be. life is a paradox. Thats where we often come to a corner asking ourselves what do when really want. Where do we go from here. What are we going to do?
Thats where i also learn.. just be it. Let it flow. Dun worry. The more you think, the more confuse you get, the more upset you become so why not just let it go? Im not rich.. so be it. Im single nobody want.. so be it.. im a nobody in the cooperate world.. so be it..
Whats important is, im still healthy, i have many friends, i still got a job, i still have my family, i still have a roof over my head, i still got 3 meals a day. All this make me smile. Anything else is consider a bonus to me, something that will make me laugh..... thats my life
Just trying very hard to be contented"- Si_Botak, STOMP.com.sg
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