Ben & Jerry's Made My Day

I raced down to VivoCity this afternoon from work after Eileen informed me about the Free Cones' Day at Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream. The good news, I did get my free ice cream; the bad news, I did not see her around, or perhaps we failed to recognise each other. Yes, I am a freakin' cheapskate but c'mon, you don't get free ice creams everyday right?

The moment I got there I was surprised by the queue, although I should've expected it (typical Singaporean mah). I stood around for the next few minutes until one of the staffs directed me to the queue entrance . . . . out at the foyer! Fortunately the queue moved pretty fast and it wasn't long until I finally reached the second queue. Along the way, the usherer caught my eye, a young lady with the most sexiest pair of legs I had ever seen. Long hair, fair skin, pink radiant cheeks with light makeup and a rather thick eyeliner, wearing a Ben and Jerry's tee(which I sworn were nearly semi-transparent!) and a pair of sexy hotpants. Then, she spoke. The next thing I know, my heart paused and my eyes fell wide open, she had the most cutest and sugary(make that extra) sweet voice I had ever heard with an American accent. I could not for the life of me believe the voice came from her lips, it was as though I had died and gone to the Loony Tunes at Warner Bros.

Anyway, I departed after I got my free ice cream cone and I never talked to the girl-with-the-cute-voice, although we exchanged glances and giggled like shy little kids.

I snapped a picture before I left, check it out. The moment I saw this fella, I just had to stiffle a laughter:

The Malnutritioned Ben and Jerry Cow with *ahem!* very suggestive erm..... glands.

The Forbidden Kingdom

I had my mom watch the movie with me, yes I'm still a mommy's boy despite being a rebel and all. Anyway, the long awaited film was nothing short of wonders. Not everyone might like the movie but hey, to each his own.

Magically transported to ancient China by a twist of fate, Jason Tripitakas(Michael Angarano) finds himself holding the legendary Golden Staff of Sun Wukong, the Monkey King. Along the way, he meets Lu Yan (Jackie Chan), Xiao Yanzi A.K.A Golden Sparrow (Liu Yifei), and The Silent Monk (Jet Li), who aids him in his mission to return the Golden Staff while teaching him the way of martial arts in hopes of freeing the Monkey King and finally returning Jason back to modern day Boston. It simply a western made Wu Xia film, paying homage to kungfu legends(during the intro) and lifelong accomplishment of Jackie Chan and Jet Li. Collin Chou stars as the Jade Warlord, a villain whom I thought could equal that of Mr.Smith from The Matrix trilogy. And finally, Li Bing Bing as the White Witch (yes, a tribute to the Bride With White Hair)

Unfortunately, the whole film falls short of expectation with Jet Li as Monkey King. He didn't look half like it nor had the nimbleness and agility of Sun Wukong, in fact he looked like a very old man with overgrown golden hair. The only time when Jet Li displayed any nimbleness was during the eight minute duel with Jackie Chan, using the Mantis Fist Style. Meanwhile, I guarantee you'd be amazed to find Jackie Chan disguised as an old man at the start of the movie.
If you're able to catch the plot at all, it quite an entertaining movie, in fact it left me wanting more. There are profound moments when Lu Yan and The Silent Monk teaches Jason kungfu. Somewhere between the lines of what I remembered, Lu Yan said, "kungfu can be applied even to the butcher who is so skillful that when slicing meat his blade does not touch the bones, or the poet whose poems are so graceful that it touches the emperor himself and makes him weep." Or during a short scene when Jason asked The Silent Monk, what if he freezes from hypothermia and Jet Li's character simply replies, "don't forget to breathe."

If you're a Zen buddhist, or have any knowledge of Zen, you'd be able to catch the famous Zen koan, Empty Your Cup when Jason Tripitakas tries to tell Lu Yan that his cup is full and the drunken immortal tells him, "exactly, how can you learn when you already know so much? Empty your cup!"

All in all, this is quite an enjoyable movie but don't expect much. Most dialogue in the movie is actually English and as my mom commented, "funny isn't it? even the Jade Emperor can speak English." In reply I simply say, that's why they're deities mah!

Okay Fine I Know I'm An Oddball

I've developed a malfunction lately, and it apparent I've been noticed; I was working in the kitchen halfway when the Chef walked up to me with an unusually friendly smile and said, "Ey, Max how are you?"

"Erm, I'm good Chef, thank you very much." I said, trying my best not to look disturbed. I mean, there's always a catch when he comes to you in such manners.

"I saw you walking around the streets today you know? You didn't come back to rest, you were talking to yourself know? I saw you." The Chef said, looking extremely amused. "Are you okay Max?"

At that point of time, I sort of freaked out. Oh f**k! Just when I didn't want to be seen. I gave my best blur look and said, "Yes Chef I'm okay thank you."

"You really okay Max? I thought something wrong with you know? Why? Why you talk to yourself hmm?" The Chef queried.

"Oh, I er talk to myself because there's no one to talk to so I just talk to myself." I replied.

"You should go out with the guys know? You never go out with them?" The Chef persisted, still looking amused.

"Yes Chef, yah I did for lunch just now."

"You you okay a not? You should carry a earphone know?" The Chef suggested, pointing to his right ear. "Cause people will think you talking on the phone, I thought you were talking on the phone but I didn't see a earphone know? You were talking to yourself."

"I thought something wrong with you know?" The Chef repeated.

Still looking blur, I simply smiled and said. "Alright, yes Chef."

After a while, the Chef smiled back then turned around to talk to someone else.

Oh f**k, I thought. Was I seriously that obvious? Yes I know I'm a little dysfunctional, or to be precise I've been abnormal since I was a kid but I didn't think I was too obvious. Yes, looks like I'm talking to myself again but who am I to blame?

A - I don't have friends who are free for little chit chats as though they've nothing better to do with their time.

B - It the only mean to keep myself occupied while I'm alone.

Yes, I am fast becoming senile, so sue me.

Mr.Grumpy / FHA 2008

I swear to God I will never ever step into another polyclinic. I had to wait nearly 2 freaking hours to see the doctor despite the tiny crowd, and for that goddamn 2 hours I sat watching as the television replayed 4 absolutely dumb episodes of Mr.Bean Animated over and over again while I anxiously waited for my number to flash. And you know what? My queue number was 2417, and every so often the panel would flash anything between 2400 to 2418 but never 2417 (What the f**k right??). After 2 mad hours, my patience was exhausted and I simply left.

The worse thing was, I had to wait nearly another half an hour in a private clinic before I finally sat down in the doctor's office. I practically cursed and swore the whole afternoon, wondering why it was so hard just to get some medical attention. Just what the f***k do people do in there?! Anal examination?? Geesh~!

On to FHA, despite all the buzz, the Food Hotel Asia exhibition at Singapore Expo was a big disappointment. Seven halls and just one tiny corner was set aside for the annual culinary competitions, a far cry from which many of us in the industry were truly looking forward to. It was obvious that this exhibition was meant solely for commercial purposes and not the true celebration of food just as Desmond had described.

Life Has Been Reduced to This...

All I do from day to day is work, work and more work. I'm banging out plates and plates of food, sweat dripping from my head, temperatures escalating, chef's cursing, adrenaline's pumping.

I get home from work, rid myself of sweat stained clothes, gets in the shower then it a quick dinner cum supper before I hit the sack. 6 days a week, 13 hours a day non - stop including school days then wash, rinse and repeat. I've zero social life and zero time to mingle with anyone. MSN is always quiet, I've little friends left to approach by the time I get home and no gal pal to talk to. I regret not making KaiLee mine when I had the chance.

I'm constantly under the whims of the chef, who enjoys nothing more than breathing down his employees' neck. Pressurised to perform, compete and pushed to go beyond our limits without a single complain, without sufficient rest, my body and mind is threatening to break. I don't know if I should love or hate my life and career.

LIFE ISN'T ABOUT FINDING YOURSELF. LIFE IS ABOUT CREATING YOURSELF.

As you think, you travel, and as you love, you attract. You are today where your thoughts have brought you. You will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you.

Mission

Having lost focus of my destination, I must today remind myself of my own true mission as a chef; I did not embark upon this journey to seek fame, fortune or recognition.

I took up the chef's jacket from day one, in hopes of a better future. My mission is to create a fighting chance for survival, not just for my family and friends but for the masses, especially the needy.

I hope to create solutions that will reduce famine and starvation as well as promoting healthier and affordable meals for my fellow countrymen if not the world.

In the future as a chef, I will in the long run create an industry that will provide job options for the general public, retirees, unemployed workers from all walks of life, handicaps and gifted individuals until no one is left to starve, wander or sleep along the streets.

It may be ambitious and insane but I swore upon this oath, and fight to fulfill it.

Neccessary Distractions

For once out of my busy days, I shall allow myself a little distraction just for fun to keep my brains functioning. Ziyi posted me a question the other day, "why didn't you make me your victim?"

I was deeply amused although to be honest, I never actually found an answer nor gave half a thought to it. So, I'm going to think about it. In the meantime, everyone will just have to play guessing games.

Other matters aside, I apologise to all my friends for neglecting everyone. Work has kept me, so I swear once I've done my time I will make it up to you guys. Tianpeng suggested that I serve French cuisine for Christmas this year, not my favourite but I shall consider. If you'd like to try something, simply send your wishes by end of August 2008 and I will customise recipes just for each and everyone of you. If things go well, I will invite all for dinner after mid September, I promise. Oh and Jacq, could you be a darling and remember to get me a Rubik Cube? Love ya lots.

Lastly, I was absolutely thrilled and surprised to find out that one of my junior from secondary school is getting married the end of this year (solemnisation at July). She was one of the 4 juniors I was most proud of and adored. Even though I'm full of envies and despite the fact that it makes me feel like I'm getting old, I have nothing but blessings and congratulations for her. Whether or not I will have time to participate, this will be an event I definitely look forward to.